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January 06 Junoon.Advocates of writing Arabic using a Latin script need to get a life. No joke. Let's look at a small example: writing the slang word "look" : (masculine) shuf, shof, shuof, shoof, shofe, chouf, (feminine) shufi, shofi, shufee, shofee, shoufi, shoufee, shoofee, shoofi, choufi, choufee Better yet, what about the real word for "look"?: (masculine) undhur, unthur, undhor, unthor (feminine) undhuri, undhuree, unthuri, unthuree, undhori, undhoree, unthori, unthoree That's just scary. Hint hint, Said Akl. November 28 Random Phrases on Random WallsOf the very few good random phrases I've seen written on walls/desks/bathroom stall doors, this is one of the best: "They gave me $5 for a $100 textbook." It was written on a couch somewhere in Coffman. The moment I read that statement, I could just feel the burning anger and frustration of the author at receiving such a small amount in return for selling their textbook back to the bookstore. It was cool. Made me think a little bit too. Back in the UAE we had an obsession with covering our school desks with white corrector goop (whiteout). The stuff comes out of the pen ever so smoothly, and you apply it ever so carefully, until the whole wooden desk is covered with a smooth layer of wet white corrector pen. The next day, you can use your new white desk proudly. If math class gets too boring, amuse yourself by scraping off the layer of whiteout with a metal ruler, and reapplying it all over again. Make sure to pop any bubbles of air that get trapped on the surface while you're at it. If you like to be even funkier with your desk-decorating, use different colored highlighter pens to make colored patterns on your white-washed desk. I unfortunately know all this from experience. But anyway, back to random phrases on random walls. It's really weird how one person writes a sentence or two about a lost love or some frustration they have, and a totally random stranger actually responds with some words of wisdom such as "he's so not worth it!". People, get a life. Seriously. Talk about adaab il hammam, or lack thereof. One Arabic word for the bathroom is 'bayt al adab' which just goes to show how you're supposed to behave in the bathroom. Unfortunately, I've never heard an equivalent term for that in English, which probably says something ... November 26 Guns at Jordanian weddings
من مذكرات زينب ابن عمي صالح سيتزوج ، و قد جئنا لنشارك عمي فرحته بزواج ابنه ... كنت أتأمل هذا العدد الكبير من الناس ، و سرني جداً أنني لم أسمع صوت عيار ناري ، فقد طلب عمي إلى المدعوين ألا يطلقوا الرصاص ، و استحسن الجميع رأيه "From Zaynab's Diary"
(context: young Zaynab goes to Madaba for her cousin's wedding): "I was happily wondering at the large number of (guests), and was very pleased that I didn't hear any gun shots, for my Uncle had asked the guests not to fire any guns, and everyone respected his wishes." I guess Jordan has been having a problem with guns at weddings going off unexpectedly or backfiring...therefore, the sure way to solve the problem is to subtly teach fourth grade kids that firing guns at weddings is not necessary and that you can in fact ask your guests to leave their rifles at home, without being shunned by society for giving up aspects of your culture's celebrations, as Zaynab's uncle did. It's called instilling values/norms in a child at an early age. Quote from a certain Ryan who went to Jordan's blog: "The one custom I haven't gotten used to is the firing of guns into the air for celebrations. Our village, at times, has sounded like a war zone. Not the smartest practice if you ask me, but it happens at weddings and tawjihi parties all the time (I just stay indoors... for fear of falling bullets). In fact, last week in the village next two ours, two wedding guests were injured when bullets fell back down.... DUH!!!" (Source) There you go. Hey, I just realized I did a previous post in which the humor revolved around the issue of guns at Jordanian weddings accidentally killing people (the JFK Asassination: The Jordanian Theory). And I don't mean to be dissing any culture or anything, but in my opinion, if the cultural practice does more harm than it does good, why keep it? Or at least, let it be constructively criticized (I'm probably not criticizing it in the most constructive way but whatever, hopefully my point has been made).
November 13 Salma and I discuss serious issues online.Hooray for online chatting. (censored btw) Salma: this movie... :'( me: what is it? Salma: not really but you know me: tell me Salma: a movie about a pregnant lady that lived in walmart and then had her kid me: HAHAHAHA are you serious? Salma: and her mother came back after having left her for a long time and took her 500 dollars its soo sad her baby just got stolen by bible loving mississippians Salma: a tornado is about to happen,and they are all going into their cellars cellers? you know me: i know what a cellar is thanks its like someone who sells stuff HAHA jk Salma: hahah that was good me: it was. I learn it from you Salma: she walked into the tornado and is like threatening it psycho weirdo she grabbed onto the stairs and is flying all the stuff is flying out of the cellar Salma: guess what ? me: what? Salma: the lady she was living with died in the tornado me: hahaha Salma: and then she left all the stuff to the walmart lady pretty cool huh? me: yeah is that the end?! Salma: no now she is a photographer and she just go back from winning a contest --------------------Salma: her friends kid just called her and asked something and he wouldn't put his moma on the phone and now she is in her friends house looking to see what happened and what happened was her friend was beated up by her new boyfriend wallah man, alhamdullilah we don't have all that crap me: beated up? sad dude, sad Salma: whatev man what ev -----------------------------Salma: well. what are arabica beans me: umm coffee bean *coffee beans Salma: oh... do you know if there is anything special about them? me: no they're just really really great coffee beans I mean well known the arabica bean is of supreme quality out of all the coffees of the world Salma: oh ooooohhhh i knew there was something cool about them since they have the word arab in it me: yeah now if they were Palestinarabica beans holy baloley that would be something Salma: that would be That's what lack of sleep does to you. Salaam. November 10 Advertising.It isn't very appealing how one of MSN's main advertising companies is Lamisil. How gross is it to be reading a blog post on here with a huge picture of a fungus-infected toe being very obnoxious at the top of the page? That's just not cool. MSN needs to get a life.
Nothing more to say, really. Except that other people should update their blogs, because what is the point of having one otherwise?. Oh, and I have recently discovered the absolute best way to make the greatest tea ever. No joke.
November 06 Whoosh.So I realized that when you open this blog page, you are overwhelmed with a 'whoosh' of pink flower power. Which might be kind of annoying for some people.
But I'm not changing it. a) because there are no better alternatives, honestly, and b) because I like pink flowers, to an extent.
It's really kind of funny that I am choosing now, of all times, to blog. I have a midterm tomorrow that I'm only half done studying for. What do I do when I have midterms and am supposed to be studying? I procrastinate, and part of that is updating this blog with the most unnecessary posts ever. I think it would be interesting to conduct a study that shows the degree of increase in my blogging activity relative to how many exams I have that week.
Tasneem, I hate the fact that you are causing me to speak Lebanese so easily. My accent is easily influenced when I'm around Lebanese people; I attended a Lebanese school my entire life so that makes it all the more easy for me to start saying things like "kinti neymeh shee?", "shoo 3am b'illik", and "biddi illik shee" instead of "kunti naymeh?", "shoo 3am ba7keelik", and "biddi a7keelik ishi". On the other hand, I have successfully implanted the word "bardu" into your speech permanently; a great accomplishment.
Aramaic is so cool. Look (source Wikipedia, what else):
Neat as heck.
October 19 طلاب مدارس العين الخاصة - يا عيني عليناHolla. Long time no blog. Because I am not in the mood to type much, and because I am in need of some big time laughter right now, I'm posting this. 3aad yfarri6 mi'9i7ik *UAE accent*: So I'll post the whole thing even though it's long; I was in Al-Sanawbar school and some of what's written here is true, actually. Especially the bit about ywaalah and ghash :p. Completely hilarious, let me know what you think, and here goes: طلاب العين وكيف تعرف من اي مدرسه خاصه
مدرسه العالميه الخاصه:
اووووه عاد العالميه مول هب مدرسه.. غجر العين كلهم في هالمدرسه....واتحصله بو الشباب ياي المدرسه من الساعه 6 الصبح عنبوو حارس مب طالب مستعيل على رزقه الاخ ...لااااا ومرات على كيييفه يداوم الساعه 12 ولا 11 واتقول ياي العين مول هب مدرسه.... واتشوفه مرصص هالعيون على باب البنات (اتقول رادار) صدق مب شايفين خير و....طبعا واول ما يوصل المدرسه ما يروح صفه هذا لانه ما يدله اصلا.. يروح عند المدير ولا الوكيله وايتقهوى ويدق سوالف اتقول قاعد مع واحد من خويه لا ويوم يخلص ياخذ لفه على قسم البنات (مستوي مشرفة البنات لوول) ... وهذا طبعا حالهم كل يوم .... وايام الامتحااااااااانات اوووه معيدين الشباب ايام الامتحانات....طبعا اذا دخلوه قاعة الامتحان يكتبون اسمهم ويكتبون اغنيه على كل سطر في الورقه....ثقافتهم واسعه ما شاء الله عيني عليهم بارده....وعقب حوااااااااطه فالمدرسه الاخ يتمشى عالكرنيش... وهاذيلا ما عندهم سالفه غير الضرابه اي ضرابه تستوي ولا اي واحد من ربعه يستويبه شي على طول ماشي كلام ضرب ودم وسيوف يتحرون اعمارهم في حرب
مدرسه الصنوبر الخاصه:
(الغش هو طريق النجاح وبدونه يخرب عليك الصباح ) هاي قاعدة الحياه عندهم...وطبعا اصغر واحد فيهم عمره 30 احليلهم عمروو فالمدرسه عايبتنهم القعده ولانه المدارس الثانيه عيزت وهي تنجحهم واخر شي راغتهم وما لقوا غير الصنوبر .....لا تعال وشووف سياايييرهم الي ضارب عاكس والي رقمه ثلاثي الي يشووف السياره ايقوول اكيييد الي فيه مزيوون ما يدري انه احلا واحد فيهم يشبه خالد الملا واقصر واحد فيهم طوله مترين... تهريب الاكل عندهم شي اساسي ومهم جدا لول... انا احيد الناس اتهرب مخدرات حشيش لا هذيلا اكل عنبووو مجاعه لا بس في منهم الي يدوخون وهذا النوع تحصله كله نايم في الصف ما يدري وين الله حاطه و في الفسحه يروح مع ربعه ياخذون شفطتين في الساحه الي ورا المبنا داخل الاشجار و يرجع الصف يكمل نومته.... وطبعا ما عندهم شغله غير اليواله و يواله ثم يواله يعني وين ما يروحون وين ما ايون راقدين تعبانين انت بس شغل اغنيه ام كلثوم وسلاااااامــــــــي عاليويله .. واذا اي حد فيكم يبا فرقه حربيه فلا بد من فرقه الصنوبر الحربيه بس هاه ما وصيكم انا ما يخصني اذا كسروو روسكم.... وطبعا حالهم حال طلاب ييرانهم العالميه ...ترا يقولون من عاشر قوما اربيعا يوما صار منهم
مدرسة الظفره الخاصه:
وما ادراك ما الظفره....سلامي على طلابهم احليييييييلهم دور البرائه امره راكب عليهم بريئييين سجاجييين قصدي مساكين...ينفعون حق الافلام الهنديه.. لا لا ما يرقمووون منو قال لوووول(من برع هاللله هالله ومن داخل يعلم اللله)...لا اونهم عاد ما يسوون هالحركات محترمين عسب يطيحون البنات ومناك اكبر طاف مسكين حالهم تعبهم راح عالفاضي لول.... ولولا المديره جان ظهر اليور والمنكر وطبعا نقطت ضعفهم المديره... واكبر واحد فيهم طوله نص متر ...وما عندهم سالفه غير يخيسون باصات المدرسه بالبيض ويكسروون جرس الانذار وايد عليهم.... واتشوف الولد اللي طول ماهو ماشي محتضن دفاتره وكتبه تقول هذا يحضر ماجستير وطبعا هذيلا هب المواطنين لانه عدد المواطنين الي فيها 2 ونص وهال نص مشكووك في امره ...ومن يدق جرس البريييك على طوول اتشوفهم عند غرفة المدرسات الي في قسم البنات اونهم عااااد مثقفين عندهم سؤال لول ... وطبعا ما خلو طاوله ولا يدار الا وكتبو ارقامهم بالغلط كتبو على طاولة المديره ...وبعضهم ايون المدرسة ما عندهم سالفه غير الطنازه على كل من يشوفه و خاصة الاستاذ ما يقول الاستاذ كلمة الا و اطنز عليه مثال:طالب كان قاعد يرقص في الصف يقول له الاستاذ شو فيك؟ يقول : انا اخوي مايكل جاكسون نحن خوان في الرضاعه)) يحاول يخف دمه و ما يخلي حد من الطلاب الا واطنز على شكله وهو شكله اخس منه...لا وايام الامتحانات الاخ داخل قاعة الامتحان وهو مبحلق هالعيون عالبنات نو وي يصد اي صوب ثاني اتقول ظاهرتله اعصبه في رقبته وطبعا ما يحل شي الاخ... ويظهر من الامتحان وهو شاق هالحلج من الفرحه على باله بينجح فالامتحان
مدرسة ليوا الخاصه:
اوووه عاد ليوا ... طبعا عصباح الله خيرتلاقي الواحد ماشي وفاج هالحلج ليش ما ادري الظاهر انه يستمد طاقته من استنشاق الهوا أو يمكن له مأرب اخر لا أعرفه..لا وبعضهم اييك من صباح الله خير وريحته سقاره (مصنع دخان متحرك) تلقاه مخلص باكيت كامل قبل لا يدخل الصف وتشم ريحته من بعد 10 ميل
مدرسة الشويفات:
اسميها
هالمدرسه تنقع من الضحك وبالذات طلابها ياي المدرسه ورافع هالخشم وعلى شو
ما ادري...تحصله مسوي تقشيرحق ويها وبدكير ومناكير اونهم عاد كول...لا
والمشيه اتقول مشية عارضة ازياء (مس ليبانون)...ولا وفي بعض الطلاب يعني اللي يرقص في مشيته ما ادري سبحان الله ربي عطاه الهز الطبيعي من دون ادنى ضرب على الطاوله يقوم يرقص على باله الحفله بدت لول August 16 عامية and homework
بيصير الواحد يكتب بالعامية؟
ليش لأ! عادي .. أنا شايفة إنو اللهجة المصرية هي أسهل لهجة ممكن الواحد يكتبها بالعامية الصراحة ما عندي شي مهم أكتبه هلأ بس حبيت أحكي للأخت صنعاء (أو صنعة) اشي : شفيتش إنتي!؟؟ ليش تتطنزين عليّ و انتي ما تسوين شي أصلاً .. يال بشكارة انتي .. شو تبين مني؟ ها؟ بمزح معاكِ طبعا ، سلميلي على شخبوط من شان الله اوكي؟ And now: if you can figure it out, feel free to use it! My favorite ma'lubeh recipe - voila! It's very easy, çok çok kolay. Biraz patlıcanı kızartıyorum. Sonra, tancereye patlıcanı koyuyorum. Eti pişiriyorum. Sonra, pişmiş eti koyuyorum patlıcanın üzerine. Pirinci ve baharatları tencereye katıyorum. Yarım saat bekliyorum. Tenecereyi çeviriyorum. There you have it. Affiyet olsun. Next post's tıtle, ınshallah, ıs "Explaining Israel’s Mysterious Imperial Agenda" courtesy of Cipher. July 30 Snippets of Some of Our Conversations in EgyptI wrote my second post on Islam, Culture, and National Liberation without saving it. And lost it. So I decided to write this instead, in an attempt to get over my loss. Inshallah I'll rewrite the other post asap. Uff. Qaddar Allah ma shaa'a fa3al.
By the way, the conversations below were all in Arabic. I just translated them into English for the purposes of this blog.
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- "No, don't get the tamarind, you never know what kind of bugs could be in the tank. Plus the tamarind juice is black so you can't really see how fresh (or not) it is..gross."
- "But Omar bought tamarind juice yesterday and drank the whole thing!"
- "AAAAAAAAAH...Omar is going to GET IT..the stomach ache he is sure to have will teach him to listen to me next time I tell him NOT to buy tamarind juice, especially from this vendor."
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- " You kids keep eating this roasted corn, and forget about lunch or dinner or anything. Hmph." ~ My Grandad
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- "There I was, sitting on the balcony, drinking my coffee peacefully, when suddenly I see candies flying out of the bedroom window out onto the street.. the shabaab were shoving each other out of the way, trying to catch the candies..who was throwing them?!" ~ My Uncle
- "HASSANNNNN!!!!" ~ everyone listening to my uncle's story immediately and correctly assumed it was my little brother
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- "What is fiseekh?" ~ Me
- "Raw fish." ~ My cousin
- "How can you eat raw fish?"
- "Well, it's been soaking in salt for years so the salt sort of cooks the meat."
- "But it's still raw, right?"
- "Yeah."
- "And we're having it for dinner?"
- "Yeah." .. "Although you could have leftovers from yesterday if you want."
- "I'll try the raw fish."
- "Good choice."
Later on, my Grandad finds out we've purchased fiseekh for dinner. He happens to despise the stuff. So he tells me:
- "My granddaughter, don't eat the fiseekh. You'll hurt yourself, all that salt isn't good for you."
- "But Seedo, I want to be adventorous and try it!"
- "Well make sure to drink lots of tea after you finish, don't drink water right away."
- "Will do, iA."
The fiseekh was gross. I ate two bites, then decided to eat the other variety of fish we had purchased; a smoked (COOKED) fish called Ringa. I also envied my Grandad and my 6-year old cousin who had decided to go with leftovers from the night before.
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- " Wow, this is a great view of the Nile - subhanAllah..." ~ Me, filming the Nile
- "Yeah..hey wanna go down there - what's that noise?" ~ a cousin
- "Sounds like Walkie-Talki static.."
- "EXCUSE ME, what are you doing here?" ~ an official wearing a police-like suit carrying a walkie talki
- "Umm..filiming?!" ~ Me
- "WHY???" ~ the guard
- "Because we're here on vacation and we wanted to film the view."
- "Put the camera away. You can't film here. Come on, put it away now, in front of me."
We put it away and left. Musta looked pretty suspicious; two teenagers, two little kids, and a filming camera. Speaking Palestinian Arabic, in Egypt. My dad later told me that there is always heavy security at any busy bridge in the middle of Cairo, so no hard feelings towards the security guy..I guess.
----------------------
- "Alright, we'll act like Egyptians and try to get in the park by paying only Egyptian fares. If they find out we're not Egyptian they'll charge us triple the price." ~ an Aunt of mine
- " Okay" ~ everyone
- "Alright..you little ones, do not talk at all. They'll know for sure we're not Egyptian if you talk. Everyone else, put on your best Egyptian accent..Let's do a practice round, come on." ~ Aunt
- "Izzayik, 3amlah eh? Khushi goowa ya bit! " ~ everyone practicing
- "And one more thing..we all need new names..more Egyptian names..You can be Sherif, and you'll be Naggi..and you can be Tamer...you're going to Ulfet..and you can be Fathiya...ok? Let's go." ~ Aunt
- "This'll never work." ~ everyone else
It did though..amazingly. AND we snuck the video camera in to the park with us, and got some nice footage. Great times.
--------------------
This is where we were:
 July 25 ParadoxOn Yesim's blog I found an interesting picture :  paradoks akeed, walla la'? Part II. of Islam, Culture, and National Liberation coming soon iA. July 12 Jeopardy. sigh.Currently watching fake Jeopardy with Jay Lenno on the Tonight Show starring George Bush, Superman, and Kim Jong-il . Erm... unrelated to Jay Lenno: Reality (political, social, economical, state/structural) seems to have hit (finally) for many young UAE nationals. I hope it will lead to positive change inshallah. However, it seems to me that a lot of people seem to be finding the easiest way of dealing with reality is by blaming it on everyone else, which is disappointing but unfortunately not suprising?! Ignorance plays a big part here, pure human nature another. I need to write about this, being more explicit, but am sure I will come under a tirade of resentment from a good number of people who do not see the issue from my point of view and who think I am simply bashing the country and its people. Which I am not. Ugh. Political correctness sucks. Like heck. I desperately need to finish my post on the problem with the UAE - I have been writing tidbits of different posts and other stuff which is why I have not completed any single piece yet. Soon, hopefully?! iA. --- It's 120 degrees in this 1950s house that, although alhumdulilah large and wonderfully-located, lacks proper cross-ventilation and air conditioning. The fans aren't doing much either. I am getting close to understanding how the underpaid, overworked and oft-abused workers from the sub-continent feel living in their cramped aluminum caravan houses stuck out in the hot sun, provided by their evidently unaware, uncaring and (evidently) heartless employers back in - yep, you guessed it - the UAE  . Sorry.--- ya ilahi. Allahuma sabbirna ya rab. June 11 Regarding Insects and Good Friends who help you deal with Insects.I had an interesting conversation with a certain Algie about a certain insect that was in the room with me as I typed. The conversation is as follows (excuse the capitals, btw):
إن يحجبوك عن العيون لأنت في جفني تنام ... says: AN ENORMOUS إن يحجبوك عن العيون لأنت في جفني تنام ... says: LARGER THAN LIFE إن يحجبوك عن العيون لأنت في جفني تنام ... says: SCARY إن يحجبوك عن العيون لأنت في جفني تنام ... says: TERRIFYING إن يحجبوك عن العيون لأنت في جفني تنام ... says: EVIL LOOKING أمينة ~Nutty Fish~ says: sounds like an elephant إن يحجبوك عن العيون لأنت في جفني تنام ... says: CREATURE أمينة ~Nutty Fish~ says: apart from the evil bit إن يحجبوك عن العيون لأنت في جفني تنام ... says: AN INSECT OF SOME SORT أمينة ~Nutty Fish~ says: eww إن يحجبوك عن العيون لأنت في جفني تنام ... says: PLLLLLLZ DONT LETTIT COME THIS WAY إن يحجبوك عن العيون لأنت في جفني تنام ... says: im trapped إن يحجبوك عن العيون لأنت في جفني تنام ... says: in this room alone with it أمينة ~Nutty Fish~ says: loool إن يحجبوك عن العيون لأنت في جفني تنام ... says: I have to get out إن يحجبوك عن العيون لأنت في جفني تنام ... says: wallah im not kidding أمينة ~Nutty Fish~ says: I know أمينة ~Nutty Fish~ says: but I'm not trapped with it أمينة ~Nutty Fish~ says: so for me.. it's v funny
أمينة ~Nutty Fish~ says: lol أمينة ~Nutty Fish~ says: can it fly? إن يحجبوك عن العيون لأنت في جفني تنام ... says: HELL YEAH إن يحجبوك عن العيون لأنت في جفني تنام ... says: IT HAS إن يحجبوك عن العيون لأنت في جفني تنام ... says: HUGE WINGS أمينة ~Nutty Fish~ says: oh أمينة ~Nutty Fish~ says: yuck إن يحجبوك عن العيون لأنت في جفني تنام ... says: IT LOOKS LIKE A KILLER BEE إن يحجبوك عن العيون لأنت في جفني تنام ... says: BUT إن يحجبوك عن العيون لأنت في جفني تنام ... says: FIVE TIMES LARGER إن يحجبوك عن العيون لأنت في جفني تنام ... says: ITS BROWN WITH YELLOW LEGS أمينة ~Nutty Fish~ says: KILL IT!! إن يحجبوك عن العيون لأنت في جفني تنام ... says: AND LOOOONG إن يحجبوك عن العيون لأنت في جفني تنام ... says: TENTACLES إن يحجبوك عن العيون لأنت في جفني تنام ... says: I MEAN إن يحجبوك عن العيون لأنت في جفني تنام ... says: ANTENNAES إن يحجبوك عن العيون لأنت في جفني تنام ... says: AND A SKINNY ABDOMEN إن يحجبوك عن العيون لأنت في جفني تنام ... says: *shudders* أمينة ~Nutty Fish~ says: just kill the bloomin' thing! أمينة ~Nutty Fish~ says: lol إن يحجبوك عن العيون لأنت في جفني تنام ... says: I CANNNT إن يحجبوك عن العيون لأنت في جفني تنام ... says: IM NOT BRAVE ENOUGH إن يحجبوك عن العيون لأنت في جفني تنام ... says: PLUS IM WEARING SANDALS إن يحجبوك عن العيون لأنت في جفني تنام ... says: EEEEW IMAGINE إن يحجبوك عن العيون لأنت في جفني تنام ... says: SQUIRT إن يحجبوك عن العيون لأنت في جفني تنام ... says: its looking at me, I think. أمينة ~Nutty Fish~ says: urm.. إن يحجبوك عن العيون لأنت في جفني تنام ... says: I think it's trying to get out actually إن يحجبوك عن العيون لأنت في جفني تنام ... says: through the window أمينة ~Nutty Fish~ says: well help it out then أمينة ~Nutty Fish~ says: open the window إن يحجبوك عن العيون لأنت في جفني تنام ... says: the windows dont open إن يحجبوك عن العيون لأنت في جفني تنام ... says: they're the permanent kind إن يحجبوك عن العيون لأنت في جفني تنام ... says: Im in the library أمينة ~Nutty Fish~ says: well where's the door? إن يحجبوك عن العيون لأنت في جفني تنام ... says: far away إن يحجبوك عن العيون لأنت في جفني تنام ... says: faaaaar away إن يحجبوك عن العيون لأنت في جفني تنام ... says: I wonderrr أمينة ~Nutty Fish~ says: just charge at it إن يحجبوك عن العيون لأنت في جفني تنام ... says: maybe I could إن يحجبوك عن العيون لأنت في جفني تنام ... says: AHA!!! إن يحجبوك عن العيون لأنت في جفني تنام ... says: maybe I could trap it somehow and إن يحجبوك عن العيون لأنت في جفني تنام ... says: flush it down the toilet?! أمينة ~Nutty Fish~ says: K إن يحجبوك عن العيون لأنت في جفني تنام ... says: like take it out of the room أمينة ~Nutty Fish~ says: you have very strange ideas إن يحجبوك عن العيون لأنت في جفني تنام ... says: in a kleenex إن يحجبوك عن العيون لأنت في جفني تنام ... says: what do you mean?! إن يحجبوك عن العيون لأنت في جفني تنام ... says: but poor bug nontheless. إن يحجبوك عن العيون لأنت في جفني تنام ... says: that sounds cruel, the flushing-down-the-toilet idea أمينة ~Nutty Fish~ says: yeah إن يحجبوك عن العيون لأنت في جفني تنام ... says: the thing is, إن يحجبوك عن العيون لأنت في جفني تنام ... says: it looks like it has a stinger إن يحجبوك عن العيون لأنت في جفني تنام ... says: which is why im scared إن يحجبوك عن العيون لأنت في جفني تنام ... says: imagine if it latched onto me أمينة ~Nutty Fish~ says: go and get someone إن يحجبوك عن العيون لأنت في جفني تنام ... says: and إن يحجبوك عن العيون لأنت في جفني تنام ... says: I dont even want to think about it إن يحجبوك عن العيون لأنت في جفني تنام ... says: I GOTTIT إن يحجبوك عن العيون لأنت في جفني تنام ... says: Ill throw a large book at it إن يحجبوك عن العيون لأنت في جفني تنام ... says: drop it right on top of it أمينة ~Nutty Fish~ says: K إن يحجبوك عن العيون لأنت في جفني تنام ... says: so it wouldnt squish under my foot إن يحجبوك عن العيون لأنت في جفني تنام ... says: but إن يحجبوك عن العيون لأنت في جفني تنام ... says: I might get in trouble with the library then. أمينة ~Nutty Fish~ says: take your sandal off if you don't want it under your foot إن يحجبوك عن العيون لأنت في جفني تنام ... says: Sigh. إن يحجبوك عن العيون لأنت في جفني تنام ... says: hmm good idea أمينة ~Nutty Fish~ says: take it off أمينة ~Nutty Fish~ says: creep upto it slowly أمينة ~Nutty Fish~ says: say bismillah إن يحجبوك عن العيون لأنت في جفني تنام ... says: its doing something weird at the window إن يحجبوك عن العيون لأنت في جفني تنام ... says: like إن يحجبوك عن العيون لأنت في جفني تنام ... says: just sitting there heaving أمينة ~Nutty Fish~ says: well what would you do if you were stuck in a room with a frantic lunatic? أمينة ~Nutty Fish~ says: HAHA إن يحجبوك عن العيون لأنت في جفني تنام ... says: HAHA ?? أمينة ~Nutty Fish~ says: I was talking about the insect's current situation إن يحجبوك عن العيون لأنت في جفني تنام ... says: oh. إن يحجبوك عن العيون لأنت في جفني تنام ... says: I mean yeah I know. إن يحجبوك عن العيون لأنت في جفني تنام ... says: but the lunatic thing. إن يحجبوك عن العيون لأنت في جفني تنام ... says: anyway إن يحجبوك عن العيون لأنت في جفني تنام ... says: back to the bug. أمينة ~Nutty Fish~ says: lol إن يحجبوك عن العيون لأنت في جفني تنام ... says: ugh ugh ugh إن يحجبوك عن العيون لأنت في جفني تنام ... says: I HATE dealing with bugs.
إن يحجبوك عن العيون لأنت في جفني تنام ... says: Now its pawing at the window, if you can imagine a bug pawing, إن يحجبوك عن العيون لأنت في جفني تنام ... says: I wish it would just shrivel up and die. ---------------- It didn't though. It remained at the window. I remained in the room, gingerly, for about another half an hour. Then I got out of there. Allah yustur. June 08 Ooglers oogling on Oogle: Star Wars and Tree Climbing. Oh, and bugs.Assalamualaikum, I feel like blogging but I don't have anything to say. So I'm blogging anyway. "Blogging": the fact that that is a verb tells you something about the era we live in. I wonder if there will ever be affordable flying cars for individuals and families. You would never have to change the tires. Or hardly every, anyway. Flying cars would be so cool. Imagine sky-highways and intersections and floating stop lights and stuff. Like Star Wars but with less shooting... I like Star Wars. One of the few, if not the only, Sci Fi movie (set of movies) that I actually appreciate. All the freaky-looking characters; the different 'species' of creatures living on different planets..talk about diversity. I liked Darth Maul the best. And this one blue and green lady-creature in the background cast of the scene where Anakin Skywalker is getting ready for the pod race in Episode I; she had long tentacles sticking out of the two sides of her head, in the back, and she just looked pretty cool. Queen Amidala's outfits are something else, too. I think that was one of the major reasons I watched the movies to begin with; her dresses were just...perfect. Outrageously, ugly-ishly, poofy-ishly, fanatsy-ishly perfect. I feel like climbing a tree. I always climbed trees when I was a kid. I would take my own risk when climbing the tree and every consequence that would ensue would be my own fault. So I couldn't complain when I would get scratched, for example. That was what made tree-climbing so perfect for me..I felt like I was in control. I was an excellent tree climber, actually. No bragging here. I learned to get an appreciative feel for the bark of each individual tree; I could mold to the shape of the branch that I needed to slither up; the air was always cooler in a tree rather than under a tree. Plus, there were always interesting goodies to be found up in trees like crab apples and funny-looking green inch worms. Oftentimes I would relax in a nook between two large branches and rest my head against the trunk; I could sit there for hours listening to the leaves rustle and thinking about weird things, including but not limited to: what we were going to have for lunch; how I could get myself to look at the sun without my eyes hurting; how I could avoid eating my onions at dinner; how I could convince my parents to take us to Dairy Queen; why Minnesota was so much better in the summer than Al Ain; why Minnesota smelled so different from Al Ain; whether or not worms, bees, and spiders go to the bathroom and if so, how; why my feet tingled everytime I would jump off a high branch; when we were going to go to the Mall of America; when BT was going to come out so we could play on his swing set...and so on... Today I gave someone a copy of the Quran. She asked for it, which is what struck me. I hope she reads it inshallah, and that it affects her positively. Allah yhdeena jamee3an...Aameen.. Enough rambling for the sake of rambling. Peace out. May 24 Nutty Fish - oh so tasty (not)Bismillah Quick entry because I have zero time available: Currently humming Outlandish's "Look Into My Eyes" ... Umm Ali: Salaam and welcome back !! Hope your trip was excellent and you are adjusting well to life over there, inshallah !! It's fantastic that you took some time to come and leave a message, jazakillah khair ..Allah ma3aki ya ukhti Nutty Fish: I decided that I like veal or lamb with nuts, better than fish with nuts. Like lamb rolled in pistachios then pan fried.. yum. So unless you can come up with a nice fish dish that incorporates nuts and actually tastes good, I'm afraid you'll have to become my Nutty Lamb..(although fish just sounds better *sigh*). Aisha: heeeey I visit your blog all the time and it's soo cool that you passed all your classes and are going to be getting another degree!! Mashallah and may Allah grant you success to do everything that pleases Him. --------------- I think I really like the latest trend in bathroom sinks, yknow those bowl sinks that look all elegant and come in every design imaginable. But imagine trying to get your foot into one of those things to make wudu..not practical. Observe:  So: your options are: get two sinks, one bowl-shaped and the other regular, or make wudu in the bath tub, or make wudu using the garden hose, or go to your mosque to make wudu, or get a wudu-performing fountain thing to put in your bathroom, or use a bucket. Or just get a regular sink. Erm..my May Session class is intense. Brain is fried. Today's favorite recipe: is going to have to be ma'loobeh. Haven't had it for so long, and there is some awesome meat just WAITING to be made into ma'loobeh sitting in the fridge. Tomorrow inshallah I shall make the kitchen my Kingdom (Queendom) once again and turn some everyday ingredients into a faaaaaaabulous and healthy stick-to-your-ribs pot of ma'loobeh, just like back home. (I learned my patter from the Food Network, think Barefoot Countessa mixed with Paula Deen). Erm, did I mention Brain is fried? Oh, and no, sorry, you can't have my ma'loobeh recipe. It's secret. I got it off this forum from a lady who said "this recipe never fails" and I mixed it with some of my own stuff from the way I used to make it and alhumdulilah, it has not failed me once. Props to the anonymous forum- lady. Brain is fried - in ma'loobeh grease!! Over n out. Allah ma3kom. May 20 *Cough Cough* - take the nasal decongestion !Sslambz:
Couple of things today/this morning (yes, it's 12:30 am)..random things?! :
- Who gets a cold in May? I do. Hullo. Next time you see me coughing constantly at a meeting, I swear I'm not doing it out of boredom or anything. I just really am coughing.
- School starts Monday. May session. I want it to be over with. I want to get on with the summer. Oh yeah.
- I do plan on continuing the post regarding the Problem with the UAE. It's just that it requires one to think; and I haven't been motivated enough to actually think for the past week or so.
- Why do people have blogs if they only update once every two months? I do not understand it. Update for goodness' sake! What the heck is the point if you don't? I try to update mine once a week at the very least. Usually every few days. Argh.
- WD thank you very very much for the cool photos of the last day; dude you haven't changed a bit :| .
- Amz: sanks a bunchiiiiiieeeeeeeeeees for the photos of the party (congrats to Alaa btw :D) and for the cool and rofl-y message on Facebook. I can't wait to be in that position too, ahem, or maybe I can. I want to talk to you about that, it made me crack up. Also, I remembered something:
Once your dad took us dune-riding. It was crazy fun, and everyone was shouting "Algeria we have an off-road team" , and our heads were getting bashed on the ceiling of the jeep every time we went over a small dune. Anyway, when we got done, your dad said he was taking your brothers and you to Popeye's for dinner, and you were just dropping us off and I was so sad because I wanted to chill with you longer. And then to my utter surprise and immense pleasure you guys asked your dad if you could stay at our house and I asked if you could eat dinner with us and you seemed very excited. I stressed the fact that we were having defrosted lasagna for dinner and therefore nothing like Popeye's, but you guys pleased us with "Who cares? Lasagna is good." Dude, I was the happiest girl on earth at that moment. That you wanted to stay with us. Remember how long ago that was. Cool. Thought I'd share it.
- Some people need to get a life and stop scaring others with completely lunatic randomeness. Seriously. Stop being scary. La 7oooooooooooooooooooooooooool. 3an abooh. :D
- Last Saturday of teaching tomorrow inshallah. I brought presents for the kids. They'd better like them or else. 0 out of 15 on the final exam. Ahem. Not.
- I knew there was something else?! Can't remember though. I spose this is plenty fer now.
Oh yeah, for the million or so people who have emailed me, called me, texted me, Facebook walled me, or anything else and who I have not responded to, please forgive. I have been immobile for the past week because I became mysteriously glued to the TV and have only been able to get up to stuff my face cave with fattening food, and pray. And cook good things to stuff my face cave with (and the face caves of my family members). I have tried to isolate myself from the outside world and relish the fact that I can spend a whole day doing nothing but watching re-runs of worthless TV shows. It's been utter bliss, but now it's all over, and inshallllllah ta3ala I will be back up and moving and responding to everyone asap. Just remember: asabru jameel. Thanks a bunch.
That being it, I think I will end this by pressing "Publish". And the period should go outside of the quotation marks, because it just looks demented when it's inside. So "there".
Tamma bi 3awn illah. :D
May 14 BukhoorOn Saturday we had guests over; people leaving the state, saying goodbyes.....
My dad happens to love and appreciate traditional Arabic incense, or bukhoor. Everytime we have guests over, out comes the mabkhara (incense burner) and the large plastic containers of the bukhoor. The incense resembles loose, flaky brown soil with red, blue, yellow, and sometimes green shiny little beads in it. First you take one of the hard, round coals, and heat it over your stove until it starts to smolder; you then place it in the mabkhara, and put a teaspoon of the loose bukhoor on top of the coal. Finally, if your guests are really special you can add a piece of hard, yellowish-white sap on top of the other stuff; this piece of sap will melt and give off a very strong perfume.
My dad takes the mabkhara and 'bakharrs' the house with it, moving from room to room and waiting for a few moments in each room until the perfumey smoke has a chance to waft into every corner. I personally do not mind bukhoor when there is a moderate amount of smoke, and when there are windows in the room. I actually agree that it smells pretty nice. However, the bathroom ya baba?
I sit on a large green cooler in the kitchen and watch my dad as he blows on the smoldering coal. He looks up, crosses his eyes at me for a second, then resumes blowing.
Me: "Baba, what if the guests don't like the smell of the bukhoor or the smokiness?"
My dad: "Ya baba, hush up." (I love it when he says this).
Me: "But honestly, what if they don't like it, and you're supposed to do what pleases your guests, and isn't ikram il daif -"
Baba: "wajib. exactly. akramnahum wa at3amnahum wa asqaynahum wa -"
Me: " khanaqnahum bil bukhoor."
Baba: "Using bukhoor is a 3aadah 3arabiyyah aseelah wa 3areeqah ya baba, ifhami." He doesn't understand why some people might not like the heavy-perfumey smoke.
Me: "Fine." I secretly resolve to open all the doors and windows in every room that my dad 'bakhirrs' before the guests come.
We go down to the men's sitting room and he waves the mabkhara around while the smoke fills the room. I open the door, let some of the smoke waft out, then push the door back and forth to keep the air circulating. My dad looks at me in annoyance. I grin at him cheesily. "Shut the door" he tells me. I shut the door. Baba wins. As usual. I hope our guests appreciate bukhoor and the history behind the tradition of bukhoor. I also kind of wish we were having Emarati guests over instead of Palestinians; I wouldn't have to worry about them not liking it ;) .
April 25 Peace and Quiet.Elesin: And does peace mean quiet for you? (Soyinka, 50- Act 5). Well? Answer. April 23 ايه ده؟What the ????????
Why does "Weddings and Bridal" keep backtracking every blog post I publish? Ugh. It's not funny.
يقطع الانتخابات ، و اللي خلّف الانتخابات ، و اليوم اللي شفنا فيه انتخابات
Today's best word: fiqhi problem April 09 Gophermail: The acme of lyingI believe my university email account has been lying to me. Take an example, occurring just a few days ago: someone wrote something on my Facebook wall. Something about babaghanoush. Normally, Facebook would send me an automated email notifying me of this event. But I did not receive any such email, not that day, nor the day after, nor any day to be exact. I would never have known that someone had written on my wall, in fact, had I not logged into Facebook unknowingly and noticed the change.
A simple example of how Gophermail has been acting up. Or lying. I will try my best to make up 73 excuses for Gophermail...I hesitate to assume badly of it, especially since it has been serving me quite well up until my recent discover of this lying business. So I will try to excuse it. However....if this gets really bad and I don't receive emails from people on the day they send them, and hence do not reply in a timely fashion, we all know who to blame. No, not me. Gophermail.
Cheers. Or grumbles.
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